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                          孩子,比不良情緒更可怕的是不知道怎么面對它

                          來源: www.numenleather.com 時間:2019-04-19 編輯: 人生感悟
                          孩子,比不良情緒更可怕的是不知道怎么面對它

                          在一段時間內我家經常會出現這一幕,早上女兒起床總是磨磨蹭蹭,我多次喊,一次比一次聲音大,她愈加動作慢,甚至哭哭啼啼,我想她的心情一定很差,這種壞情緒很快感染了我,心里急著上班,孩子上學又不能誤,漸漸焦躁不安了。這是相當不美好的事情,于是我痛定思痛,控制自己想要發火,柔聲說:咱們比賽吧,我來疊被子收拾東西你來穿衣服,看誰更快?她很開心和我比賽,尤其是贏了我。沒有獎勵她也很開心,看著她快速地穿衣,甚至還會想壞點子拖慢我的速度,我覺得壞情緒會傳染,好情緒也同樣是。那段時間的我常處在抑郁、彷徨和焦慮中,家里人多少也會被影響。讓家人從情緒的惡性循環中解脫出來的最好辦法,就是認清自己,改變自己。

                          原來情緒本沒有好壞,處理情緒的辦法卻一定是有好有壞。處理得好,家長省心,還能做孩子一輩子的支持力量;處理不好,親子疏遠,給孩子身心帶來傷害的同時,孩子情商發展也會受到嚴重影響。

                          一起感悟人生
                          父母首先要明白痛苦和快樂一樣都是情緒,沒有誰能快樂永伴身邊,當情緒低落、痛苦悲傷時,做父母的最該教會孩子如何面對。讓孩子懂得不良心情是一種很正常的現象,不要太過于憂慮和憂慮,不要把它幻想得多么嚴峻。
                           
                          作為家長,該如何幫助孩子呢?首先最應該做的是,給孩子傾訴的機會,了解孩子心中到底有什么煩惱,及時和他們溝通。
                           
                          小時候發生過一件事,直到現在我都記得。有一天放學回家,我不愿意寫作業。媽媽勸了又哄,哄了又勸,我還是不愿意寫。她的耐心也到極限了,很生氣,把我鎖在房間里,不寫完不準出來。我越發委屈,還有被拋棄的委屈,可我只能撕心裂肺地哭,用盡力氣去拉門,卻還是出不去。結果就是我一邊嚎啕大哭一遍寫作業,作業寫完了,本子也哭濕了。一起感悟人生其實那天我不愿意寫作業,只是因為想吃牛奶味的雪糕,她本來答應我吃了雪糕再寫作業的。可是媽媽忘記了這事,只當我是胡鬧,變成了她越兇我就越鬧。假如,大人愿意聽一聽孩子的話,很多事情都沒有那么復雜。
                           
                          同時,家長要站在孩子的角度去體驗孩子的感情,先表達對他們的了解,給予同情和安慰,然后再有針對性的給孩子供給心理支撐和協助。例如,自己的玩具丟了,也許在父母看來,不算個事兒,但在孩子看來,是個天大的事情。因此父母教育孩子情緒管理的第一步,是站在孩子的角度看問題。
                           
                          其次,孩子在遇到失利或波折呈現不良心情時,家長應予以重視,問一問“孩子你怎么了?有什么不高興的工作嗎?能夠給我講一講嗎?”暗示孩子你不是一個人在作戰,爸媽是你堅強的后盾。引導孩子將事由或心中的感觸說出來。這樣有利于了解孩子的意見,孩子在傾吐的過程中也提高了他們的心情表達能力,并釋放了不良心情。
                           
                          在孩子心情好時,爸爸媽媽應該充沛與其講道理,讓孩子認識到煩惱有之,不要因自已一時煩惱的,便認為自己最不幸自暴自棄,而應認真尋找煩惱的根源,積極想辦法擺脫。告訴他們要懂得控制心情,不良心情能夠發泄,但是不能對親人和爸爸媽媽形成感情上的損傷。
                           
                          家長可以為孩子創造一個寬松的環境,讓她們學著自己釋放壞情緒。給他們一個具體的空間,比如,孩子氣憤時,給他/她一個枕頭,供其發泄怨氣;找一個安靜角落讓他大吼幾聲、自言自語;聽聽音樂,散散步,做做游戲,進行運動等適度發泄一下,心情自然就會好轉。如果孩子不愿意跟自己說,可鼓勵孩子向同學、朋友傾吐自己的抑郁,求得幫助。
                           
                          在日常生活中家長也應以樂觀態度感染孩子,為孩子創造多種機會。讓他們參加集體活動,用集體力量淡化抑郁情緒。如,可先讓孩子看其他小朋友玩的快樂,在玩樂氣氛的感染下鼓勵孩子參與。經常體驗到交往之樂,就會沖淡抑郁情緒。
                           
                          好情緒和壞情緒一樣,不必特意去排斥哪一個,就像自信的人能接受不完美的自己。家長要多用樂觀的情緒感染孩子,讓孩子懂得不管發生什么事,都有人支持他,與他在一起。在他們的成長過程中減少孤獨、無助感,向陽而生,方能見到更多的人生美好。www.numenleather.com
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