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                          嫁得好就真的好?幸福婚姻也能來投機?

                          來源: www.numenleather.com 時間:2019-05-20 編輯: 人生感悟
                          嫁得好就真的好?幸福婚姻也能來投機?

                          在這個社會有部分女孩信奉干得好不如嫁得好,旁邊人看著她們通過婚姻得到了財富、地位、名望也越加覺得這是真理。只怨自己生得不夠美,而事實上長得美不等于就能嫁金龜婿。那些女人能擁有成功的婚姻,一定有比美貌更重要的東西,(你要非說丑也沒關系,也可以)

                          奶茶妹妹章澤天嫁給劉強東后,很多人感嘆:“奶茶妹妹交狗屎運了。”我告訴你,這才不是“灰姑娘遇到了白馬王子”,而是“強者對強者的欣賞”。
                           
                          章澤天中學讀的是南外,這可是江蘇省最好的中學。人家17歲就獲得了全國健美操大賽亞軍,全國練健美操的,沒百萬也有五十萬吧。這還不算,還有更牛叉的:人家18歲就考上了清華大學;人家大二時就被交換到哥倫比亞大學;人家剛一畢業就進了微軟;……
                           
                          劉強東為什么會娶奶茶妹妹?這才是真相。
                           
                          也就是說:你本身是一張王牌,才能和王湊成“炸”。
                           
                          默多克的第三任華裔妻子鄧文迪,在議會上的強悍護夫行為,不僅讓默多克的傳媒事業轉危為安,還收獲很多對她的盛贊,一個女人能那樣奮不顧身,除了愛,還有勇氣和智慧。而她能站在默多克身邊,用她自己的話說:不漂亮不要緊,只要你夠聰明,會用腦子,成功同樣會屬于你。
                           
                          有人做過調查城市里婚姻最穩定的群體?不是最窮的,也不是最富的,也不是中產。而是綜合實力相當的那個群體。(不要舉特例,你仔細觀察身邊幸福的伴侶,他們一定是說得來的,就是說有共同語言的,說不著的兩個人在家里長久的相處又會是怎樣痛苦的折磨呢。而說得來的人要么有共同的經歷,要么有差不多的學識,要么有相似的愛好,要么心靈上能互相慰藉、、、、)
                           
                          婚姻,從來都是強者對強者的欣賞,而不是強者對弱者的同情。一起感悟人生
                           
                          喜歡《離婚律師》中那段臺詞:“我認真做人,努力工作,為的就是當站在我愛的人身邊,不管他富甲一方,還是一無所有,我都可以張開雙手坦然擁抱他。他富有我不用覺得自己高攀,他貧窮我們也不至于落魄。這就是女人努力上進的意義。”你給我愛情就好了,面包我自己買
                           
                          你若想通過婚姻改變自己,記得先讓自己有買面包的能力。
                           
                          走進婚姻里多數人都希望得到幸福。于是出現了“經營婚姻的法寶”、“婚后相處訣竅”的文章和書籍,用來解決出現危機的婚姻。給我們一種錯覺,婚姻是靠技巧得到幸福的,而這種投機讓婚姻陷入困境。
                           
                          當不愛的時候,怎么辦?很多家庭出現婚外戀,過程一般是這樣的:剛結婚時,你倆實力相當,所以一開始婚姻非常穩定。但結婚之后,他不斷努力上進,而你呢,選擇了原地踏步,于是實力開始出現差距。當差距大到一定程度后,他就會越來越看不上你。
                           
                          同時,因為他的實力越來越強,所以受到的外界誘惑也越來越多,終于有一天,他選擇了另一張和自己差不多的“王牌”,然后開始了“目標契合”的爬山之旅。于是你大罵男人:“沒有良心”,“你就是渣男”。
                           
                          但你破口大罵的時候,有沒有想過一個問題——是不是男人娶了女人,就必須無條件跟她過一輩子?
                           
                          我告訴你:如果換個位置,上進的是女人,原地踏步的是男人,這種現象會“有過之而無不及”。
                           
                          去年,我一同學就和他老公離婚了。一開始,小兩口過得挺好的。但結婚之后,我同學特別特別上進,學習、琢磨、補課、鉆研、考級,七年里,從小職員變成了部門經理。而他老公呢,最喜歡三樣東西——酒,牌,游戲。她多次勸他:“你能不能有點上進心。”他每次嘻嘻哈哈就過了。
                           
                          去年,我同學忍不住了:“我們離婚吧。”他大吼:“還不是因為我窮,你才離開我!”我同學愣了一下,眼淚下來了:“如果是因為你窮,我就不會和你結婚了。我無法忍受的是,你一點上進心都沒有。”
                           
                          你看,不只是男人這樣,女人也如此。所以,不能簡單粗暴地就罵誰誰誰沒良心,有時候,強制白頭到老的婚姻更不道德。
                           
                          波伏娃有句話說得很經典:“男人的極大幸運在于,他,不論在成年還是在小時候,必須踏上一條極為艱苦的道路,不過這是一條最可靠的道路;女人的不幸則在于被幾乎不可抗拒的誘惑包圍著。她不被要求奮發向上,只被鼓勵滑下去到達極樂。當她發覺自己被海市蜃樓愚弄時,已經為時太晚,她的力量在失敗的冒險中已被耗盡。”
                           
                          這句話是什么意思?就是說男人,特別是中國男人,從小就被告知要擔負很多家庭責任和社會責任,所以他知道這一生得靠自己努力奮斗。而女孩子呢,從小就被親朋、社會灌輸了很多負面信息,比如“干得好不如嫁得好”,于是很多女子愛上了投機和坐享其成。所以,女孩子在婚姻中特別容易受傷。
                           
                          每當看著熒幕里的大女主,她有愛情、有友情、有財富、有家庭,我們羨慕不已,心里雖明白那并不真實,心底卻依然向往那樣的人生。不知道你想過沒有,你可以如那般獨立,做自己的主,過自己的人生,婚姻是讓我們這趟人生旅行找一個同路人,以至不那么寂寞。到了路口,可以選擇同行,也可以選擇分手,因為人生的最后一定是一個人撐過去。
                           
                          你要明白,有多大能力,做多大的夢。超出能力之外得到的,是上天的給予,努力提高自己才能配得上那份饋贈。www.numenleather.com
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